Sunday, May 29, 2011

PSA: Restaurants

Take Heed: Top reasons to refrain from taking your children to a restaurant that does not boast a play scape:

The children will bounce in the booth seats like they are in the lead at the Kentucky Derby.

Butter will become the main course for at least 1 child.

After eating all the butter she can with her spoon, 1 child will lick her plate to get any remnants the spoon may have left behind.

Meanwhile, the other child, after eating all the butter her heart desires, will use it to moisturize her hands.  And her hair.  And probably your hair.

One child will inevitably poke a hole in her styrofoam cup soaking her meal in milk.

The waitress will ask if you need a drop cloth.  She'll say it in a joking manner, but you recognize the smirk behind the tone.

Remember that butter?  It will be used to put out the open flame on the centerpiece.  You'll remember that restaurants with play scapes don't have open flames on the table for a reason.

You'll go through enough cloth napkins to make a large load of laundry and wonder if you should write an apology note and include a bottle of Shout.

You will swear under your breath to never again take the children to a sit down restaurant all the while being unable to ignore that little voice in the back of your head telling you that you will indeed find yourself in this same situation next week.

And then, you'll leave the restaurant, capture this, and realize it's all worth it, and you wouldn't change a thing.

No comments:

Post a Comment